The Insane Waiter

Running wild on customers, chefs, owners and managers since 1997. I bring to you, The Insane Waiter. What do bring to your table? A crisp bottle of San Pellegrino ? Perhaps a lovely seared Sashimi Tuna? Start off with a wonderful bottle from Tuscany perhaps? Why I'll be more than happy to bring you your White Zinfandel and Chicken Caesar. No you can't order the mac and cheese off the kids menu and sorry no, we don't serve cheese sticks....

Monday, June 08, 2009

It is what it is

The kitchen was dark, lanterns were being blown out and the front door locked when the phone rang.

"Thank you for calling _______ how can I help you?" I asked.

"Hey we were calling because our show ran late and we'll be down in a couple of minutes," the caller declared.

"I'm sorry sir, but we're closing down for the night." I replied.

"Well we have a reservation, can't you hold our table for us?" He asked.

I glanced at the computer screen, no reservations existed after 9:00 that night, it was past eleven.

"What was the name of the reservation?" I asked.

"Umm, well, it might have been under Sandeen?"

It sounded more like a question than a statement, I was being lied to.

"I'm sorry, I don't have any reservations, and I'm afraid that at any rate we're closed." I said.

"Well we'll only be ten more minutes," he pleaded.

"I'm sorry sir, I don't have your reservation and we do have to close down for the night," I answered.

"Perhaps you could join us on a different day?" I offered.

"I just don't understand, its only another ten minutes!" He said in an irate tone.

The last of the kitchen guys were about to split, if we stayed open it wouldn't be only ten minutes for them, or for me for that matter.

It would be an hour or more.

"But we have a reservation!" He spat out.

"No, you don't, we don't take reservations for the time that we close," I said.

He started stuttering something else when I interrupted...

"It is what it is, goodnight sir."

Boy I hate it when people tell me that, I hope he does too.


At 7:30 PM , Anonymous Consultant Calamities said...

What a jerk. SO glad you didn't cave and let them come...they probably would have camped out for hours!

At 11:07 AM , Blogger Eric said...

No kidding you turned him down. I would imagine by that time the line is shutting down the ovens and the fryer. Pulling the hood screens and have already put most of the food in the walk in.
5 minutes to closing is one thing but after the doors are locked...they stay locked.

At 1:18 PM , Blogger Apron Man said...

That's ridiculous. I've had many a call like that. Regular customers are the worst, because they expect special treatment. I had one gal actually say, "Can't you just drop the order by my house on your way home?" Sorry lady, I don't think so. By the way, love your blog...nice to know I'm not alone.

At 12:21 AM , Anonymous jglover said...

You know this happens ALL the time.. it's seems like every night someone try's coming in after business hours. If I'm able to stay open than great! I will. But if the kitchen is closed than to bad, we are humans who have to go home and eat too. A Community Forum

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