The Insane Waiter

Running wild on customers, chefs, owners and managers since 1997. I bring to you, The Insane Waiter. What do bring to your table? A crisp bottle of San Pellegrino ? Perhaps a lovely seared Sashimi Tuna? Start off with a wonderful bottle from Tuscany perhaps? Why I'll be more than happy to bring you your White Zinfandel and Chicken Caesar. No you can't order the mac and cheese off the kids menu and sorry no, we don't serve cheese sticks....

Monday, September 05, 2005

Dirty Dozens

So back in the day I was bartending at a local BBQ joint, fun eh?

Well as a bartender you had to work the take out counter as well...

Brutal on a Saturday rush, let me tell you.

Well while working my station a lady comes in with a take out bag in her hand.

She was in about a hour prior.

"Can I help you Ma'am?"

"Yes," she replies,"I ordered a dozen wings, and I only got eleven."


"Is this a racial thing?!?!" She inquired.

She was black...

Of course my bugged eyed response was "what??"

"Every time I come in here, YOU screw up my order, and it's because I'm black."

Shit, that's all I need in my life.

Hell the man cooking her food was BLACK, for God's sake!!!

"Ma'am I assure you it's not racial, what can I do for you?"

She opens the bag and hands me her chicken wings, or rather the remains of them.

"See there's only eleven!"

Ya, looks like that twelfth bone probably got choked down with the rest of the grub...

But dutifully I say...

"I'm sorry."

These days I would have told her my theories about that twelfth wing, or perhaps suggested where she puts it...

"Ma'am, what do you think I can do to make this better??"

She thinks for a moment, "I WANT new wings and I WANT my money back for having to come down here!"

So you WANT a hand out...

My manager comes up, rolls over, and gives in, as usual.

I don't care what color you are, I'm tired of people wanting wanting everything for free.

I don't know if she was telling the truth or not, but I've had to many people lie in my face, just to save a few bucks, or get a hand out.

I'm don't hate any particular group...

Being a long time service industry employee I do cringe at times when many types of people come in...

But hey, its equal opportunity for me, the list is a long one.

Do stereotypes play a part in your life??

Do they ever cross your mind??

I'll leave that one for you to decide for yourself.

For me, I'm tired of people plunking down the race card with accusing eyes on me, I don't hate you for your color...

I dislike you for the prejudiced view you have on me, that one goes out to my black lady friend.

Your view that I'm so petty that I'll take ONE of your precious wings because of your background is just insulting to me.

Next time I'll take your chicken, and eat it with glee, because I dispise you personally, now that would be petty, wouldn't it?


At 11:57 AM , Blogger The Server said...

Hey brother (I mean that server to server, not as a racial thing). I feel your pain on this one. I'm sick of watching managers shell out free meals, coupons, and discounts to people who don't deserve them.

The corporate restaurant world has yet to distinguish between "bending over backwards for a customer" and "bending over and taking it from a customer."

Look at the example from this post... the lady was willing to drive back to your place, chicken bones in hand, just so she could get some free food. Would that twelfth wing really have filled her up? Did eleven wings leave her feeling unsatisfied? I don't think so. Next time, tell her to bring all the trash bags from her house so you can check for discarded wings. Make her earn that free meal.

The Server

At 12:56 PM , Anonymous Big Zeke said...

What's wrong with you cynics? If she paid for 12 and got 11, she at least deserves the 12th and an apology.

I very, very seldom have a problem with a restaurant, but when I do, I sometimes get this "you must be lying" attitude that both of you seem to subscribe to.

Tell you what: not much makes me NOT want to return to a business more than that kind of attitude.

There's reason you are the server and someone else is managing.

At 1:14 PM , Blogger MisterMoff said...

The Manager actually gave her her money back?! What a wimp.

At 2:06 PM , Blogger Nightmare said...

I try to hate everyone equally. It keeps me sane that way.

Sort of.

At 6:02 PM , Blogger The Server said...

Big Zeke, you missed the operative phrase in the first paragraph of my comment regarding shelling out free meals... "people who don't deserve them."

Some folks do deserve a free meal. Spill a glass of red wine on a white suede jacket? Free meal. Screw up the food order so badly that the food doesn't come in a reasonable amount of time? Free meal. But miscount the number of wings thrown in the fryer? Cook one up and bring it out to the customer along with your sincerest apologies for having a cook that can only count to once instead of doce.

And by the by... I managed a restaurant during my tenure in the food service industry. It is no exaggeration to say that the people on the floor are usually more qualified to manage the restaurant than the folks with the gold-plated nametags.

It is better to keep silent and be thought the fool rather than speak and remove all doubt.

The Server

At 10:11 AM , Blogger Nytro said...

I have a friend who was a store director for Fred Meyer and one day a lady came in with a rug she had purchased the day before. She wanted a new rug because it had the cigarette burn on it.

Funny, it didn't have a cigarette burn when you bought it.

Yea, I dropped my ciggy on it.

So my friend told her that he could not exchange the rugs because she had damaged it.

So this lady calls corporate headquarters and complains about not being able to exchange the rug and that the store director was hitting on her.

REALLY? You mean the GAY store director?

Corporate caved and he had to deliver the new rug to her house with his apologies. This is what is wrong with America. Grow a backbone, people!

At 1:00 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Big Zeke
Yah if the order was for 12 and she got 11 that was a mistake and she should get one more.
The fact that she used the racist thing- that is wrong. Come on man. Cheap- although it is pretty clear she was even without that comment. Lastly- the cook [as it turns out, of Afro American descent like her] was in the kitchen --- not on the floor! Jeesh. A mistake. Happens. One less bone one less wing.
If she was really thinking, she could have save the gas for the drive back and dialed the restaurant up, explained she had 11 and not 12 wings and could they add an extra for the next time she ordered.
Make sense?

At 3:06 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I know this is pretty far back in the archives, but I want to add this.

Sometimes people do deserve free stuff, as mentioned before. The problem with what this woman did is that she *ate* her food, and then complained about the amount that was there. Not only did she pull the racist act, but she also very well could have been lying her ass off.

At 6:27 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm so tired of people pulling the race card and they only do it cause they can get away with it and people will bow down cause they don't want to be labeled a possible racist. It will back fire on them one day as there are already reverse discrimination lawsuits. They claim we are racist but they act more racist. She's saying YOU did this to ME because YOUR WHITE. Get over it! NO ONE cares what color you are anymore as long as you act right and are respectful but if you treat us like shit and we do it right back YA'LL throw the IT'S BECAUSE I'M BLACK!! Believe it or not I'm not prejiduce but ya'll know exactly what your doing and what your abusing.....


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