Bread Nazis

I hate bread Nazis, they troll restaurants and bars solely to run their sever for complementary bread and freak out if anything gets in the way.

Their close cousins are the Tortilla Chip and Snack Mix fascists that inhabit Mexican joints and bars.

A fond memory of mine is running my ass for refills of chips and being balled out for charging for queso and guacamole when I was a working bar at a local sports bar. Chips and salsa are free, other sides cost us more money and they will cost you money as well.

But I digress, back to Nazis.

Lately I have taken a stand against them, this has been an off and on battle for me for years. The fact is we don’t serve bread and butter, or bread and oil for that matter during lunch service.

The reason is this, we don’t want to have the guest stay for any more time than necessary and since the cost of meals is lower, complementary items such as bread, olive oil and butter aren’t figured into the cost of the meal. Bread also takes away from money making appetizers and salads.

Try telling that to a customer.

Today for instance when I asked a table if they wanted any soup or salad before their dinner they responded with, “Well the bread you’ll be bringing us will take the place of that.”

I kindly informed them that I didn’t plan on bringing them bread ahead of time as we don’t offer bread service at lunch, if they wanted something while they waited for lunch I’d certainly offer them a cup of our delicious corn chowder.

They weren’t takers.

The secondary reason I’ve taken a stand is the domino effect. The second a neighboring table notices someone with bread service they feel they’ve been slighted and demand to know where their precious bread is.

“Why didn’t you bring us bread?!” They ask with an accusatory tone.

I’ve even had a group complain to a manager that I, “didn’t even offer us bread,” in their words.
That’s because we don’t serve it, give an entitlement junkie an inch, they’ll take a mile, something that this business is known for.

The other afternoon I had a fifteen top ask when I was bringing out their complementary bread.

My choice was round up butter that gets lost in the cooler, oil bottles that had been emptied and cleaned, oil for the bottles, baskets, bread and bread plates for all fifteen guest. That or I could say no.

Guess which choice I took.

Instead I used that time to get refills for my section, orders for a few other tables, I bussed a table and I also ran food for that fifteen top.

I suppose I could be chastised for denying the wishes of the guest, but what is better service? Attending to actual needs or attending to wants that aren’t even being offered at the time.

Now myself I occasionally make an exceptions, especially when people ask politely and just don’t assume I forgot to bring them something or that I’m somehow trying to slight them.

A, “may we please have some bread,” goes much further than asking ,“Aren’t you forgetting something? Our bread?” in a presumptuous and annoying tone.

Bread is not a right, its a privlage, act like children and I will take it away, even at the risk of a subpar tip.

Of course, one acting that way pretty much means I wouldn't expect much of one anyways