The Insane Waiter

Running wild on customers, chefs, owners and managers since 1997. I bring to you, The Insane Waiter. What do bring to your table? A crisp bottle of San Pellegrino ? Perhaps a lovely seared Sashimi Tuna? Start off with a wonderful bottle from Tuscany perhaps? Why I'll be more than happy to bring you your White Zinfandel and Chicken Caesar. No you can't order the mac and cheese off the kids menu and sorry no, we don't serve cheese sticks....

Tuesday, April 25, 2006


Comp has been down all week with a virus, perfect timing with finals coming up.

Well anyways will get back to posting soon.

Any questions or topics you'd like to hear about?


At 4:40 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I used to work in a restaurant, started as a busser (when I was 15) and ended up doing both hostessing and waiting tables. Whenever we had large parties and we depended a lot on the bussers to help, we split up the tip with them. (ie. they'd be in there helping to clear out the dishes and sometimes they'd help carry some of the food in or get drinks, depending how busy we were)

Do you ever do that or agree that there are times the bussers/dishwashers deserve some of the tips? I know a few of the wait staff I worked with wouldn't have given up one bit of the tip if the manager/owners hadn't split up the tips in those situations, even if others were doing most of the work for them.

Anyway, I was just curious about your opinion on that. We hear about all the bad customers, but are there times that the employees (managers, bar tenders, servers, hostess...ect) are clearly in the wrong that you'd like to relate to us?

Hope your finals go well for you and you can grace us with another of your posts soon!

At 6:59 PM , Blogger Wireless Messiah said...

Glad to see you're doing okay. I can't think of anything to particuarly ask for. Thanks for writing and letting us know you're there. :-)


At 10:26 PM , Blogger irishlucky said...

How about another part to the Restaurant Species Guide?

Oh, and good luck on your finals!

At 5:34 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nephew Dude:

(a) Will you be taking off a half-day on May 1 after all? Being half Latino and all.

(b) In your years in the food service industry---in the kitchen, as a bartender, and as a waiter---you've no doubt seen your share of undocumented workers as dishwashers, busboys, etc. What IS your opinion about the immigration issue?

(c) What kind of training did you ever receive from employers after they hired you for one food service position or another? In my second job as a waiter, the mgr. trained us specifically on how to walk with several dinner plates balanced on both forearms. Some sections were down five or six steps. Others were up five or six steps. He had us walking around the empty restaurant up and down steps practicing how to keep plates balanced. (There were no large trays to carry so many orders.) On another day, that same mgr. trained us in wines and liqueurs. How not to handle glasses with fingertips around the top of the vessel, but from the stem of the glass instead. (Your Gramps used to HATE IT when he was handed a cup of coffee or a glass of iced tea with the waitperson's fingertips around the top of the vessel!) Back to the mgr. He TAUGHT US what wine went with what entrees, what liqueurs were best with what desserts. At that training session, I was the only trainee who got loaded from imbibing all the samples. He was delighted at my enjoyment, told me I'd make a good salesman for those extras, and would increase my table bills accordingly. That's exactly what happened. Another training session was focused on special desserts like the flamming baked Alaska. The mgr. taught us to heat up our own little saucepans of brandy, take them to the diners' tables, light the heated brandy with a match, and dramatically spoon the flaming brandy onto the baked Alaska from way up high, so that every diner in our section could see the blue fireballs falling from on high. It was impressive. And it raised our tips accordingly. We did the same flame routine with cherry crepes, etc. The mgr. told the cooks right in front of us not to glare or growl at us when we had to place a little saucepan of brandy on their grill to heat it up. Another session the mgr. taught us how to carve NY steaks and Chateaubriand steaks for two, and how to help customers crack crab legs, etc. All this before he ever let us out on the floor to wait on people. I think it's a great disservice when mgrs. don't train their wait staff on how to actually wait on customers. The wait staff look like fools. And the customers leave unhappy. So tell us about your training adventures.


Uncle R.

At 2:40 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'd like to hear some stories about the good customers/tippers you've had.

At 7:11 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Uncle Dude has inadvertently hit on an important point. In my experience, waitstaff I encounter show no evidence that they have had any training at all. When I experience bad service, I don't blame the waiter/waitress, but instead I attribute it to bad management.

Waiting is unique in many ways: there are no barriers to entry, no particular education or experience is required, the pay is sub-minimum wage and benefits nonexistent, and if you combine that with apathetic or absent management you have a recipe for disaster. When I worked in restaurants years ago, as a busser and as a cook at different times, it was as if management did not exist and training was unheard of.

At 8:49 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

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At 8:50 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

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At 7:55 PM , Blogger # said...



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