The Insane Waiter

Running wild on customers, chefs, owners and managers since 1997. I bring to you, The Insane Waiter. What do bring to your table? A crisp bottle of San Pellegrino ? Perhaps a lovely seared Sashimi Tuna? Start off with a wonderful bottle from Tuscany perhaps? Why I'll be more than happy to bring you your White Zinfandel and Chicken Caesar. No you can't order the mac and cheese off the kids menu and sorry no, we don't serve cheese sticks....

Friday, December 23, 2005

Yes, I'll Have Exactly What He's Having...

"Except I want a different side dish..."

"No, and I mean no onions, I'll send it right back if there's any..."

"Extra Vegetables, don't you have asparagus, do I have to get the broccoli?"

"Well I suppose that will have to do."

"Oh, I want Western dressing instead of the house..."

"No Western?"

"Ranch then..."

"On the side, no onions as well"

"Oh, and I want my steak rare but not too rare, you know pink but not bloody and not burned on the outside..."

Hmmm, I jot all this down in note form...

In other words you want something completely opposite of what your husband ordered.

Its interesting that customers that want to order easy, exactly like their friend or whatever make it as hard as possible.


At 3:03 AM , Anonymous WyldWaitress said...

I hate "not burned on the outside" the most. I work for a restaurant chain that blackens all its steaks, and some people have trouble with the concept.

At 5:34 PM , Anonymous Eustacia Vye said...

I can't stand when people try to make up their own temperatures.

"I want mine extra-well done, but I still want it JUICY. Don't be serving me no dry steak!" (Direct quote)

At 2:29 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'd like a blog update exactly like TheInsaneWaiter's, except make it a waiterrant.

At 2:36 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

two of my favorites:

"i want it medium rare... well.. medium.. actually give it to me between medium rare and medium..."

ugh. or as you mentioned the

"and i'll have exactly what he's having... except no beans and no cheese...and extra broccoli instead of mushrooms"

well then, it's not *exactly* the same now, is it?

At 8:02 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why are people so damn picky. If your having dinner at a relative or friends house are you this picky, probably not and you'll eat whatever your served. Good lord people it's a good thing you all don't live in a poor country where you'd be tickled to death to eat a slug.


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