But We Eat Here All The Time!

God I had that sentence.

That means you think you are a regular, but you aren't.

The other day I was taking care of business (TCB to all you corporate types)

At the same time I walk into a situation.

It's Friday night, the books are full and someone decided to pre-order over the phone.

The hostess took the order even though she shouldn't and was trying to hand it off to my buddy Jarad.

He refused to take it.

"But they say they eat here all the time," our hostess friend pleaded.

Finally one of the managers comes up and assigns the table and food to Alicia with a stern,"we don't do pre orders," to the hostess.

Well our friendly regulars want their dinner at 6:45, the order goes back with the time and of course the chef is all,"what the fuck."

I'm getting busy and I'm hitting my hustle and flow, momentarily forgetting the situation.

Around seven I notice two entrees pushed to the side of the line, a filet is among them.

"Shit ya!" I explain as I grab a steak knife.

Chef shouts out,"that's that fucking pre-order!"

I glance at the time, they're late.

Another half an hour passes, in my trips around the restaurant I notice one of the regulars, one of the ones nobody wants to wait on.

I smile at her as I pass and as usual she shoots me a nasty glare.

Ah yes, a sweetheart this one.

Well I start to put two and two together.

She's the pre-order.

As I'm back in the kitchen I notice their food still to the side.

"Hey Chef, what's the deal with this steak?" I inquire.

"Fucking idiots, their food was cold so now we've got to remake it,"He said.

"I'd throw it in the micro boss."

"Ya, well they wanted new entrees."

So they aren't even going to eat the same things.

I see Alicia their server ringing in orders and I go up to her,"Hey what's the deal with that chick, she's your pre-order right?

Alicia glares back,"This is horseshit, they bitched me out for bringing them cold food, hell they were supposed to be here forty five minutes ago."

"Now they're all pissed that they have to wait for their new food to cook."

I think for a moment,"Hey, you know what I would do, box up their old food and charge them for everything."

Better than throwing away sixty buck in entrees.

"But my tip..." she stammers.

"Hun, you're not going to get shit for one anyways, she hates women servers, thinks they're trying to get on her man."

"That scrub? Why didn't Jarad take them?" She groans as she rolls her eyes.

"They wouldn't tip him either, she thinks every guy is looking at her tits."

Alicia giggles,"Ya she wears that shirt so you'll look at her shoes."

"Good luck hun."

Later on I walk by the table, she shoots another nasty look my way.

Fucking shitty regulars, only they use that,"But we eat hear all the time!"

Well, we wish you wouldn't.