The Insane Waiter

Running wild on customers, chefs, owners and managers since 1997. I bring to you, The Insane Waiter. What do bring to your table? A crisp bottle of San Pellegrino ? Perhaps a lovely seared Sashimi Tuna? Start off with a wonderful bottle from Tuscany perhaps? Why I'll be more than happy to bring you your White Zinfandel and Chicken Caesar. No you can't order the mac and cheese off the kids menu and sorry no, we don't serve cheese sticks....

Monday, April 19, 2010

Hi friends!

Hi everyone, figured I'd give a bit of an update since my last post.
It came to my attention via that I was mentioned on a article about late diners, here is the link...

So its been since late last summer since I’ve had an updated posting, the sushi joint that I was briefly at continues to exist, somehow. They haven’t been able to keep a server for more than a couple of weeks and they continue to steal from the staff. Yet people love going there.

I guess its kind of like buying Nike products, even though an eight year old Guatemalan girl makes them for thirty-five cents a day, as long as its trendy people will go there no matter what the social cost. Not that I was a sweatshop employee or even comparable, but I’ve noticed that with restaurants, some of the worst employers get the best reviews.

C'est la vie…

The Italian joint that I was at continues to do well, I have friends that work there and I’m glad to see they made it through the hard economic times in pretty good order.

Am I sorry I left?


Sometimes you gotta know when to cash in your chips and leave on your own terms. I’ve seen to many good friends get burned out by a joint and go on someone else’s terms with their head down.

But sometimes I hear the call, everyone and then I miss “the biz” as we call it. But as Murtaugh said, I’m getting to old for this shit.

Eventually things all end or change. I can feel myself changing a bit, when I go out to eat I actually find myself enjoying my dinner rather than nitpicking on what the waiter is doing or how my drink was made or watching the manager bumble around, its kind of nice.

Sometimes the dreams still come though, the restaurant is full and I’m the only waiter in sight and every food item is wrong or burned.

Then I wake up and its over. Sometimes it was like working three shifts, a double then dreams all night followed by another double.

They say that dreams are you working out unresolved issues, but really, what is so unresolved about serving a veal piccatta?

Schools is going well, I’m about to start my last semester and looking for an internship that hopefully will lead to a “big boy” job. I actually have the grades to go further and am exploring taking the LSAT or GMAT this fall. Who knows, at 29 its kind of hard to think about another three years of school, I feel like I started the race about five years too late as it is.

Well here is a brief “server story”

I was in at the old joint about a month ago, only recognized a few people, lunch is where all the “noobs” get scheduled and the biz is notorious for high turnover as it is.

A couple of my former coworkers were in having lunch so I stopped at their table to say hi.

“Hey Joe, how’s school going?” asked Jen.

“Oh good, wrapping up the semester and doing some traveling this summer.” I said.

“How is Miyabi?” she asked.

“Oh it was bullshit, wasn’t there too long, got in a fight with the chef about paying for mess ups.” I responded.

“So where you working these days?” she asked.

“Just going school, got a solid grant that is paying for some of my expenses, I’m getting by if not getting rich.” I said.

“But you need to work! Are you looking for a job?” She asked.

“Oh maybe I’ll work up the street at 801 Grand.” I said, home of a Fortune 500 company. (not that I’m delusional to think I’ll be CEO, never know in this life though)

“Oh, well I heard they make good money there, are they hiring for night shifts?” she asked. (the building is also home of a premiere steakhouse)

“No, I won’t be working at the restaurant there, probably Principal.” I said.

“Oh,” she said with a frumpy appearance, ”that sound BORING.”

“Well, its why I went back to college,” I said.

“Oh, well good luck, I guess,” she said.

I was instantly reminded of the last post I made last summer. I will never demean anyone making an honest buck, from digging ditches to hustling tables to the CEO of Principal.

But there was that tone, the fact that someone bettering themselves was in the wrong and nothing besides waiting tables is legit, that “big boy“ jobs are for bores and “I make as much money as those cubicle monkeys.”

She’s young still and sold on the biz, kind of like I was when I was her age and it is easy to be jealous of the success of others and to tell yourself a lie.

But all things change, you always have to move on, you have to know when its time to leave on your terms.