The Insane Waiter

Running wild on customers, chefs, owners and managers since 1997. I bring to you, The Insane Waiter. What do bring to your table? A crisp bottle of San Pellegrino ? Perhaps a lovely seared Sashimi Tuna? Start off with a wonderful bottle from Tuscany perhaps? Why I'll be more than happy to bring you your White Zinfandel and Chicken Caesar. No you can't order the mac and cheese off the kids menu and sorry no, we don't serve cheese sticks....

Friday, July 18, 2008

Customer, right?

Well, here’s a first for Insane Waiter, I’m going to side with a customer instead of the house/employees.

I came across this on bitter waitress and there is a nice discussion on their forum which I find interesting.

Now I may snicker when someone orders a well done filet and then asks for ketchup, and I bitch about shitty wine and the mother of all fuck-up, ranch dressing.

However, at the end of the day I’ll get it for you, I may make fun of you on here or perhaps have a laugh over a shift drink on how someone ordered lamb chops well done with a side of 57 Sauce, but I’ll get it for you.

This whole debate comes from a barista that refused to give a man a simple triple shot over ice. Apparently it ruins the integrity of the coffee.

It wasn’t something that was hard or impossible to due, but apparently espresso has become more sacred than the Holy Sacrament and deserves a higher level of veneration than the Lord of Hosts.

Here’s both sides, for fairness sake.

I Am Not Lying



Friday, July 11, 2008

Bad Guy

That’s right, I’m the bad guy.

I have a weekend night off for one and apparently I’m not a team player because I declined to pick up the shift.

The thing is, earlier in the week the banquet that I was supposed to bartend at cancelled, fair enough. I went around to everyone that worked on Friday night and sought out to pick up their shift.

All refused me, and I am fine with that. I resigned myself to having the night off and I made plans for later in the evening, after all I never have Friday night off.

This morning when I woke up I was greeted with a text message wanting me to pick up the shift, “no thanks,” I replied, “I have plans.”

That was fine, nothing wrong with asking.

When at work a highly hung-over co-worked approached me.

“I heard you were looking to pick up tonight,” she said.

“Well I was earlier in the week, but I have made plans.” I replied.

“I don’t feel very good, you should work for me.” She countered.

“Sorry, but I have plans.” I said.

“Like what, you going to the bar or something?” She said with a snotty tone.

“What I do on my free time is my own business.” I replied.

“Well I think its pretty rude for you not to work for me, you have the night off.” She said.

With a nasty tone.

I replied, “having tonight off doesn’t obligate me to do shit for you, I don’t know how it is rude for me to refuse you when your “illness” is self afflicted. I worked all day yesterday and I was hung over as fuck, deal with it.”

The next thing you know she’s throwing a fit to the manager about how I won’t cover for her.

“But I want tonight off and he won’t work for me!!!” She whined.

“I can’t make someone work on their night off, that isn’t how we run,” replied the manager.

“But I don’t feel good, he was supposed to work tonight anyways.” She said back.

“Look, there’s a whole list of people not on tonight that you can call, if you cover the shift then fine, if not I expect you to be here,” said the manager.

She stormed off in a nasty mood.

Later in the shift another hung-over waiter came up to me and started pitching a fit that would only be a repeat from the above if I wrote about the situation here.

Then I received another text message asking me to work, from another employee, I replied with a no.

They replied with a “why not!?!?!”

At the same time the other hung-over server came up and joined the fray.

“I just don’t see why you won’t work tonight, you wanted to the other day and I don't think its fair,” she said.

“You want to know why, its because no one took advantage until the last moment, after I made plans. You’re right, I’m probably going out to dinner and then to the bars with friends. I don’t have to give any reason at all to be honest with you, I have the night off and its my own time. Just because all of you make this restaurant your entire life doesn’t mean that I have to. I’m going to go out and I’m going to have fun and I am not obligated to any of you.” I ranted.

“Well you don’t have to be a dick about it, maybe some day you’ll want the day off I won’t cover for you.” Said the other server.

“That’s fine, I won’t ask you then. The fact is I almost never ask anyone to cover my shift and I usually only cover for other people if its an emergency. I plan my life around the fact that I have a work schedule, unlike you. Its not my responsibility to let you go home because you drank too much last night, and the fact is that I’m only being a dick because you two didn’t let it go. No one wanted the day off until it was convenient for them, now its not convenient for me. If you asked me to work and I said no and you said ok, there wouldn’t be a problem. But, you had to whine to management and to anyone that would listen that I’m not a team player and you had to question why I wouldn’t work for you. Frankly I could have no plans but to sit on my couch and play video games and I still wouldn’t have to give you a reason. Now that’s the end of it.”

Thus ends the rant of the bad guy.